wow it's like I wrote a novel

• Hey there homie G's. It's me again. I'm back from my totally awesome/insane weekend. This is going to be LOOOOOONG. Just thought I'd warn you. I haven't uploaded pics/video just yet, since I pretty much came to work straight from Lodi, with a 5 min stop to my house to pick up some grub. Anyway, here goes. Friday morning I went to Denny's for breakfast with Leeanne. It was grubbin. Then I went home and took a 2 hour nap, then took Michelle/Dad to Sebastopol to put flowers at Mom's grave for Mother's Day since I was going to be out of town on Sunday. It was emotional since her plaque/headstone thing was actually there, and it's a giant dose of reality hitting you in the face, just in case you somehow forgot someone you love is dead. Anyway, bittersweet times up in Sonoma County, and I had a Chicken McNuggets Happy Meal for lunch [apple slices, not fries.. :-)]. I finally got back home around 4pm, and I slept the rest of the evening away. I got up at 10pm and pondered fixing a very late dinner, but I was way too tired so I just slept until morning.
  
• Saturday I went to Spring Celebration at Great America with Sandi. We got there around 9:20am and had to wait forever to get in the gate and park the car. Then we had to wait 15 minutes to get into the park. I was really excited once we made it inside, because I took my picture with Spongebob Squarepants!! Then we went potty and made it over to Top Gun.. oh I'm sorry it's called Flight Deck now. Whatever. Now this was one of the few low points of my day. We only had to wait about 2 minutes to get onto the ride.. but my fat ass couldn't fit in the harness. Look I know I'm chunky.. okay fat.. but damn. The belt thing could barely buckle. If the attendant pushed the harness hard enough I could have squeezed in. This was proved later on another ride. Anyway, it was embarrassing to get off because I couldn't fit, and have everyone stare at me. Plus some other attendant's like "Oh you didn't fit?" way too freaking loud. Gee thanks lady. Although I was humiliated/bummed, I didn't let it ruin my great day. We soon got over to the Vortex, and I was a bit skeptic about going on that one. I already had one embarrassing situation, I didn't need another. I got in line anyway, and miraculously, the attendant squeezed me into my harness. Well gave it a nice extra tug anyway. I got to ride, and it was great. Next was the The Demon, one of my faves. No harness probs on that one. Next we attempted The Grizzly which I love, but the seatbelt was way small. Okay I've had the same pants size for the last 10 years, and all of a sudden I can't fit in that seatbelt on the ride. What gives man? Ugh. I didn't feel that bad since two Samoan looking dudes had to get off the ride as well. Then I made Sandi get on Psycho Mouse and that was great. Ironic how I can get on a kid's coaster and not the best one in the park. Anyway, after that we went on Centrifuge and I took some cool video. It'll be on the Great America compilation I'll try to work on in the next day or two. After we got off the ride while searching for the Loggers Run, I ran into Chucky/Angelica from Rugrats, hugged them and took pictures. I was too old when Rugrats was popular plus I didn't have cable, but you all know how I feel about anyone in a costume. It was cute. We found Loggers Run and got pretty wet, then got drenched on Rip Roaring Rapids. I'll have to agree with Sandi and say that's my favorite ride in the park. Always has been. Spraying people is even more fun. We got some people good. Soon it was lunch and funnel cake time. Yeah I was bad, but hey it's Great America.
  
• We finally got into the Redwood Amphitheater right before Family Force 5 came on. That is one of my favorite bands, lemme tell ya. I'm so glad I finally got to see them live. They were rockin. I took way too many pictures of them, and plenty of video. Sandi took video of me too, headbanging to the music. After their set I waited 45 minutes and was able to get them to autograph a poster. I got a hug from Phatty (who said he saw me headbanging in the first row and thought I was awesome), Chap Stique, and Soul Glow Activator. Soul Glow posed for a picture as the mean security lady screamed "No pictures!" at Sandi and grabbed her arm. Soon afterwards we got back to our seats and watched the last half of Hawk Nelson who also rocked. Next was Barlow Girl. I really like them, I think I'll download some of their music. Then Mark Stuart from Audio Adrenaline came on as a guest speaker and told an awesome poop story. Just remember when God doesn't want you to do something, you crap your pants. Words to live by. When Mark was done we met him, Sandi got autographs on some pics she had, and we both posed for pics. He's really a nice guy. Cute, but married. Bummer. We got back to our seats for Kutless, and they rocked. Soon Switchfoot came on, the last act of the night. I love a lot of their music. This part of the concert sucked, even though Switchfoot was rockin. As soon as they came on, hundreds of stupid tweens/teens rushed the stage, and decided to dance right in front of us. We were in the front row. Yes the FRONT ROW. Halfway through their set, security finally started checking tickets and they went back to their seats. Then, the lead singer decided to go out into the audience, and the kids went berserk again. So we had to deal with these screaming kids jumping up and down, and some of them really needed Right Guard. Good lordy. The concert ended, and we went out to the parking lot. I was bushed and my feet were hurting, so I decided to change into my flipflops that were in my trunk. May I add that all the stupid kids from the concert were convening there in the parking lot and acting like idiots. Screaming, hanging out their windows. Well a car full of them decided to yell at me and call me a whale then a walrus as I was changing shoes. That hurt my feelings. How can it not upset me? I know I'm fat, I couldn't fit on two rides, I feel very unattractive/not pretty a lot of the time and they had to just add their little 15 year old humor to the fire. Ugh. Some of you may read this and think "Oh well, kids are kids." You know what? This was a "Christian" rock concert. Christians do not behave like that. Jesus wouldn't call some fat girl a walrus. Plain and simple. Just pissed me off. We got the heck out of there and went to Applebee's, where we both had salad. Then I headed off to Lodi to spend the next few days with Kimmie.
  
• This is turning into a novel, isn't it? I'm only like halfway done, seriously. So I got to Kimmie's late on Saturday night, and went off about what had transpired at Great America. I needed to vent. Then we did a little work on the New Kids project (top secret.. lol), and watched a second season episode of Wonder Woman guest starring Ed Begley Jr. He is such a dork. I think after that we both called it a night.
• On Sunday I woke up to Cinnamon Toast Crunch and coffee, and we watched 4 episodes of The Smurfs. I had a strong desire to punch Brainy Smurf in the head by that point. Then we went to Kimmie's niece Joyce's 12th birthday party. It was fun. Their family is interesting, to say the least. We ate nothing healthy at all. Hot dogs, chips/dip, cake/ice cream. Yummy. I'll have pics up of that, don't worry. We came back home, and did a little more work on the project. We had Subway for dinner. I got a turkey sandwich, and apple slices instead of chips. I then subjected Kimmie to Beverly Hills Cop II. Judge Reinhold plays such a lovable goof. We worked more on the project, and I crashed around 11pm while Kimmie kept on working diligently. I feel guilty for doing that, but I was exhausted.
  
• Monday we woke up around 9am, had coffee and a few cookies to tide us over before IHOP. Oh man when we got to IHOP I had stuffed french toast topped with cinnamon apples. I'm bad. I also had eggbeaters and hash browns. Could have been worse. Then we went to Walmart and I got Hot Shots/Hot Shots Part Deux (then later found out Cathy already had it), a scented candle and a magnetic photo frame. Then we came back to Kimmie's place and did more work on the project. Carol (Kim's sister) came over and helped, then later on Joyce and her mom Mt Rushmore came over and helped a bit, as we watched Howard The Duck. That movie is really funny. Oh yeah, we were bad and had Baskin Robbins. Okay so three hours later I returned my Hot Shots movies at Walmart, and picked up dinner from Wendys. I had a chicken club sandwich and a salad. Then we did even more project work and watched Problem Child. That's about it in a nutshell. I had a fun yet eventful weekend. I probably left out tons of stuff Kimmie, so add as much as you want.
  
• Random quotes that I can remember.. "I never thought I'd say this, but I want John Lithgow.".. "If Joe turned into a duck, you would help him right?"... "When God doesn't want you to do something, you shit your pants.".... "She's not fat, she's a national monument.".... "This scenario would totally make some bad lesbian porn movie. Why do we keep getting in these awkward situations?".. "Sorry, but I gotta poo.".. "Niiiiiiiiiice.. ".... "I'm sorry but if I'm walking in some alley, and both Jeff Goldblum and Whoopi Goldberg pop up out of some garbage can, I'm running.. because Robin Williams is probably nearby." Kimmie add more that you can think of. LMAO